Many of us believe that Anger is a necessary tool and can be used in a healthy or constructive manner or simply its just needed at times! While it may be true in certain truly rare emergencies, in day to day life is a very dangerous emotion.
90% of times anger leads Dis-ease, false sense of achievement, hidden resentment, ill will and future resistance.
10% of time needed action and desired results – such as real emergencies as absolute mastery in use of anger as a tool.
So can anger be channeled in healthy and constructive way?” If so, how?
YES but requires absolute purity of intent and emotion mastery.
Purity of Intent
Anytime there is use of anger for personal gains or control – its use will not be healthy or constructive. Humans can see through “intent” in your interaction regardless of the method used – whether it is “sweet talking” or “anger”.
If you would like to use Anger in Healthy way – Please be completely clear and transparent with your intent and the intent better not be selfish.
Its difficult to carry coal in your hands and not be burned. Anger is like that – most of the times, the anger first burns the person who is angry. One needs emotion mastery to be angry and keep a calm center.
How do you know you can?
You learn to turn it on and off at your will – that is your will and you are not controlled by external triggers or it does not become a habit you keep justifying
If an another person meets you only moments later, they should have “no energy level” clue that you were angry just seconds ago
I used justify anger as a tool in a work setting as a way to help others improve and over the years I realized its very tough to make it work as it had many unintended consequences like:
person going in shell or freezing or becoming passive resistant
others feeling bad about me as a boss – “What will he do if I make a mistake?
My sincere advice is don’t use anger except for “truly life or death situations” and become more assertive in your communication and action. That will make anger unnecessary in your life.
If you ever end up using it, note that you must spend “TEN TIMES” as much effort in being loving and nurturing and even then you don’t know the dis-ease you have ended creating.