Many men / women proclaim to be fearless. Fear is not just about reptiles, heights, darkness or ghosts. The deepest fear humans have is one “Making mistakes”. So in that sense we are more likely to not taking a step than facing challenge that come rushing towards us.
Why is it that we are so afraid of making mistakes? When a child is born the child is fearless and loving. Where does the fear come from? Fear is essentially ingrained in us by “well meaning” – parents, teachers, and society. They all want us to be safe. A ship in harbor is safe — but that is not what ships are built for (John A. Shedd, Salt from My Attic, 1928)
Now I would like to go further and say that “Mistakes are blessings in Disguise” – how so? If you look at any learning or coaching process, we realize that true learning only comes from experience and that too personal and sometimes painful ones.
Here’s what I learnt as a parent – that can turn mistakes in blessings. When my kids made mistakes – of judgement or simple human error or fumbled and broke something – I automatically switched to a mode of a coach – and told myself – this is best parenting opportunity you have, make the most of it.
Overtime I learnt that it was an opportunity to:
1. First and foremost show them how much you loved them – my first focus would be on how they felt and being completely accepting of them in that moment of self doubt and weakness
2. Be supportive – help them minimize the damage or do something to make it a bit better
3. Plant the lesson – once the emotions are calm and once the person feels accepted and loved – plant the lesson without any blame. e.g. Its best to use both hands when carrying something
4. Be thankful – yes exactly be thankful that you got this opportunity early on to make them stronger as a lesson learnt earlier is a lot cheaper and better than one learnt later or never.
While the example, I gave was of others mistakes, the same exact steps can be applied to oneself. Don’t be scared of mistakes you make or will make. Only learn from your mistakes and you will be stronger and a lot more happier.