Are you not getting what you want? Is there is a lot of frustration because of wasted effort? Is there a feeling of hitting a wall despite all your efforts? Is it possible to re-channelize all this effort in a way that dramatically changes the results and also your happiness in the process?
What many of us are conditioned to do is chase things. We are told to study hard to get better scores at exams and in the process we forget to enjoy the process and get real learning. When I recently asked my 13 year old daughter (in 8th grade) about how she is going to prepare for the board exams (10th grade) – to my pleasant surprise she said “I have been preparing for it since grade 1”. I was amazed at the cool demeanor and confidence that everything she did was preparation enough, so as to not be obsessed with the exam in a special way. I guess she had learnt how to integrate studying and learning in her life to not take special stress for board exams.
The lesson in life is quite simple for all of us. If we want a tree laden with fruits, we can’t water and fertilizer the fruit or the branches, all we need to do is nourish the roots and rest will all take care of itself. So why is it that we can not be patient with the laws of nature and allow the flowers and fruits to grow – which is an inevitable natural outcome?
False sense of need
Many of us have gotten into a pattern of “If only I have this then can I be happy”, “I get the best grades then only I can be successful”, “I need to have a child (be a mother) to be happy” and so on. All this sense of need creates a reverse effect of fear of not getting what you want and hence makes your energy non-conducive to attracting what you deserve.
False sense of urgency
In this scenario, we create a false sense of urgency based on our perception of the world. “I am already 27 and need to get married by atleast before 30!”, “I don’t have time to make money, need to get more money soon”. Regardless of what we want and how fast we want it, the universe is only going to respond to the our positive energy and effort in accordance with laws of nature.
Drop your obsession with the outcome and focus on doing the best you can. The right ingredients, organised methodology and persistence (not obsession) will get you the desired recipe!